if you're "beating up the beat" then beat it!

you know... bars didnt seem to mind too much when the "my new haircut" youtube video made jagerbombs a $12 staple on every frat boy's bar tab...

i guess the difference is jersey shore might be inspiring a little too much of this...


"life imitates art..." - oscar wilde

friday's random music video vol. V

the only thing more fun than this video... is watching my best friends and i sing/dance to this... old school 248 basement style.



gym class heros - "clothes off"

clarification: google garbage is not a real product

this is exactly how every single new google "product" has been explained to me.



"you dont really know what that is... do you?"

"not really!"

haha.

nbc, you can keep your leno. i have zach galifianakis and that's all i need.

PG-13 for adult language and adult content, viewer discretion is advised

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis from Between Two Ferns

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis from Between Two Ferns

hilarious.

the art of making cover art

very awesome.


ps a new edition of the "punk goes..." compilations is coming out and will be entitled punk goes classic rock. check out the killer tracklisting:

1. Hit The Lights "More Than A Feeling" (originally recorded by Boston)
2. VersaEmerge "Paint It Black" (originally recorded by The Rolling Stones)
3. The Almost "Free Fallin'" (originally recorded by Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers)
4. Mayday Parade "We Are The Champions" (originally recorded by Queen)
5. The Summer Set "Rock 'n Roll All Nite" (originally recorded by KISS)
6. We The Kings "Caught Up In You" (originally recorded by .38 Special)
7. A Skylit Drive "Separate Ways (Worlds Apart)" (originally recorded by Journey)
8. I See Stars "Your Love" (originally recorded by The Outfield)
9. Pierce The Veil "(Don't Fear) The Reaper" (originally recorded by Blue Oyster Cult)
10. Forever The Sickest Kids "Crazy Train" (originally recorded by Ozzy Osbourne)
11. The Maine "Pour Some Sugar On Me" (originally recorded by Def Leppard)
12. Envy On The Coast "All Along The Watchtower" (originally recorded by Jimi Hendrix)
13. Every Avenue "Take Me Home Tonight" (originally recorded by Eddie Money)
14. Never Shout Never "Bohemian Rhapsody" (originally recorded by Queen)
15. blessthefall "Dream On" (originally recorded by Aerosmith)

so pumped for that cd.

tuesday... more like boo-sday

tuesday has it rough. the only thing that really happens on a tuesday is that cds are released. but as people buy cds less and less, the magic of a cd release extravaganza on a tuesday seems a little lackluster. other than that, tuesday is completely boring and known for nothing. brings nothing to the table. in fact, its usually not even invited. it just quietly comes and goes as everyone discusses the rest of their week...

to really understand tuesday, you have to understand the other days of the week. (im not including television programming because that is fleeting... sporting events that happen on a given night for 30 plus years have become part of the culture. please accept the distinction and if you dont, you probably love the show "lost" and love tuesdays. and yes, im well aware that there are exceptions... like fat tuesday which is fun and election tuesday which is less fun but very important. however, it still leaves at least 50 other tuesdays each year continuing to feel meaningless. just go with me on this, ok?!)

sunday: church, football, day of rest, lounging, spending time with friends and family, soaking up one last day of rest and relaxation. sunday is probably top 3 in my mind in terms of favorite days of the week.

monday: now, i know what youre thinking... besides monday night football, what does monday bring to the table. well, monday is known not for its positives... but for reveling in its regrettable destiny as the most loathed day of the week. its famously infamous! c'mon, madonna even wrote a song about it. love it or hate it, monday is significant in the week.

wednesday: hump day! wednesday is the day that means the week is halfway over!! plus it becomes ok to go out to a big happy hour and stumble home at 2am. walking into work hungover on a wednesday morning is a little aggressive... but thursday morning, that just means you kicked off thursday with a bang!

thursday: this is happy hour day. the weekly pregame! you are celebrating that tomorrow is friday and unless you have a major project due, five bucks says you are planning to do about 1/3 the work you probably should get done on friday anyways. so you dont hold back. you take that extra tequila shot! sure and why not!? tomorrow is friday! plus baseball games happen on thursday night so maybe its a night at the ballpark. also, some big movies are released at midnight so maybe you get a group of friends together to see the new harry potter movie at 12:01! "oh you dressed up too!? errr... ok, i guess thats cool." whatever your pleasure, thursday is always a crowd favorite!

friday: too easy. come on. last day of the week. who cares if you had a bad week, within 8 hours (hopefully) you will be sitting on your couch excited about the next 60 hours of nothing in your future. or maybe you are going out with friends and its off to the preparty! movies usually are released on friday so you fandango for all your friends or your special someone! friday is a big party night as well. house-warming, house-destroying, house-adventuring(walk into a house party where you dont really know anyone but a friend of a friend told you it would be cool...). time to let it all hang out.

saturday: yardwork, errands, hangover lunch with good friends... or friends you just met... haha. afternoon adventures, barbecues, plant yourself on the couch and watch sports or movies on blu-ray. its all good. cause its saturday. check stuff off the list or go to the mall and add stuff to the list. the day is full of possibilities and nothing to hold you back because you have another day off tomorrow. stay up til the sunrise. take a day trip to nyc for the night or atlantic city to blow some hard earned cash. vegas for those on the west coast... corey, im looking at you big guy! saturday is where the big plans go down! ill take two please!

and of course... tuesday. there arent a lot of good happy hours. the majority of the week is still bearing down on you. you have had your butt kicked for the last two days and you are tired already. all that is running through your head is "still 3 days to go..." who can have fun with that on their mind. tuesday is not feared like monday... and its not celebrated like friday... its just... a connector. a place holder. a work day(which actually makes it not that great at all).

so here is my challenge to you(if you watch lost and consider tuesdays a holiday, you are exempt): make tuesday special. some people make it their day to go to bikram yoga to revitalize for the weekly home stretch. maybe visit their parents and get it out the way so you can enjoy the rest of your week. some might make a point to go out to dinner with friends. date night!? sure! whatever it is, make tuesdays memorable. if not for you, then do it for poor tuesday, the most forgotten and blah day of the week.


now that's the spirit!






this message was not brought to you by ruby tuesday, although the salad bar is glorious.

ive been addicted for a decade

Alkaline Trio - "This Addiction"

Alkaline Trio | MySpace Music Videos

new alkaline trio album hits stores today! its a solid album. if you love alk3, you wont be disappointed.

thats... gotta hurt.

usa: 5 canada: 3

as some of you know, i have some contempt regarding canada. not the people. i like canadians themselves. they are actually extremely nice. which is weird because the farther north you go, the less nice people tend to get ("tend" obviously referring to an extreme generalization... although i have already hit my "been given the finger" quota in new york for the year and i was only there for 48 hours... just saying.)

anyways, back to the source of my contempt. it all goes back about 180+ years ago. we had finally beaten back the british in the war of 1812 (did you know that the bloodiest battle during the war of 1812 was fought after the treaty was signed?! awkward.) and started running our mouths about the concept of manifest destiny. awesome! lets take what we have and keep rolling til we hit some more water. lewis and clark did some canoeing and found that there is a lot of goodness out there that we have not yet reached, brought disease to and/or wrongfully taken as our own. then there was the gold rush making cali the new hotness and people packing up their oxen and hitting the oregon trail (and thank god because i love(d) that game.) and yet... sitting just above us, was canada. an icebox chalked full of natural resources and if you go really far north, polar bears. yeah, thats right. we gave up polar bears. good thinking random presidents of the early 19th century that no one really knows or remembers.

now, i know what you are saying... they were their own country, with a government and hopes and dreams and yadda yadda yadda. arguably, you could say the same about the native americans! but because they couldnt get organized in a way that suited our european roots and of course, they lacked a traditional flag, (please youtube eddie izzard's comedy special called dressed to kill and look for the part where he talks about "the cunning use of flags." its awesome.) we kindly asked them to stand aside so we could fulfill our (manifest) destiny.

now, im not saying i want another war or anything. i think we have enough on our plate... but just that we should have just brought them under our big american wing, and made them the 51st, 52nd and if they could muster the courage and front the application fee, the 53rd state of the union (they would have to broken up to ensure that california, new york and texas are still the most influential states in government). we could have been great together! now, america is still great and canada... is just pretty good. i like toronto and vancouver seems nice. blue jays won the world series once. holler. but still, your football is weird... with a 55 yard line? is someone over-compensating a bit? not to mention, your money is called the loon... right. so, instead of all that, i think we should have all been one big happy family and canada, trust me, you are the one missing out.

now to the hockey game last night. america again looked great like we do, because we are, in fact, great and... canada looked, you know, pretty good. but not great. and you know, that win last night felt good. we beat them at their own olympics, in their own arena, at a game that, even if it was not invented there, (i really dont know and i dont feel like looking it up) they have ice everywhere and consider it their sport! they have to be good. they grew up with ice. there is some random statistic like 35% of all canadians were born on ice or something. losing to americans, that overall, hate the cold. what a dagger. taking it another step, i bet the world probably watched last night and thought "big brother just beat their little brother." like at the end, we just patted them on their little heads and said "good try."

so canada, let me follow suit and say, "good try." we all know you played your little maple leaf hearts out. now, just something to think about... we are always taking applications for the 51st state. just ask puerto rico. come on down, hang out, trade in your bearskin fur coat for a pair of board shorts and "tommy bahama" shirt, get rid of the looney and lets make a super hockey team. and who knows, play your cards right, we may even let you have an nfl team. maybe. come on canada, it feels good to be a winner. trust us. we know.

and for cinematic support of my sentiment as well as good clean fun! (caution: uncensored version)